If you must, see The Curse of La Llarona with the lowest of expectations. Otherwise, you will find yourself drowning in disappointment.
All in Reviews
End of an Era - Avengers: Endgame
In a way, it was all always one story. It was always Endgame.
Sometimes Dead Is Better - Pet Sematary
The soulless affair is all told in about the most cookie cutter way imaginable. There is no vision here—only the bastardized crumbs of King’s legendary frights.
All Of - Us
Unlike other allegorical tales like “Mother,” “Us” never forgets that it is a movie. That it is taking a shot at capturing the conceit of the American Dream is just icing on the cake.
Mostly Just Marvel - Captain Marvel
We get the origins of S.H.I.E.L.D., the origins of Captain Marvel and a good look at how she fits into where the franchise is headed from here. But all of that was to be assumed. How successfully they pulled that off is another matter entirely.
Not Again - Happy Death Day 2U
There is nothing vital or clever here. There is only the well-worn tread of tires that have been ridden too far and want to rest.
Cracked, But Not Broken - Glass
This is not “Good Shyamalan.” It is well below The Sixth Sense and not on par with Unbreakable and Split either. Instead, it’s a barely worthwhile attempt to extend the universe he created in its predecessors. But it’s interesting.
Saturday Night Five (Out of Ten) - Vice
This is what stupid people think smart sounds like.
We Should Be Listening - If Beale Street Could Talk
Following up Best Picture winner Moonlight seemed like an unenviable task. Moonlight was utterly mesmerizing and had big things to say. If Beale Street Could Talk is equally mesmerizing and somehow has even bigger things to say.
Anyone Can Wear The Mask - Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse
It is one of the very best superhero movies you will ever see. It is one of the very best animated movies you will ever see. And it is one of the very best examples of what is possible within this medium if people slow down and focus on infusing their work with the right amounts of everything.
Lived In - Roma
He knew it all.
Almost Mine - The Favourite
It is raunchy, but smart; low-brow, but wry. It is truly unlike anything else you’ve seen lately.
Black and White - Green Book
On the surface, it looks like the sappiest of sap—a self-proclaimed balm that would show the path to solving racism. And while the movie itself isn’t much deeper than that, it is so superficially satisfying that it’s hard not to appreciate the charm.
Coulda Fooled Me - Nobody's Fool
The twists are stupid, the jokes don’t land and the love story isn’t one worth rooting for. A lot of talent was wasted on this laughably bad story and we are all worse for having seen it. But hopefully this review can save you from the regret of giving it a try.
Heist Done Right - Widows
The movie has star-power, drama and is about as well put together as anything you’re going to see this year and manages the rare feat of being a blockbuster worthy of critical praise. There truly might be something for everyone here and that is almost never the case.
Little Bohemian, Little Rhapsody - Bohemian Rhapsody
The best way to describe what’s going on on-screen is a series of well-produced music videos with reenacted Wikipedia entries interspersed. The end result is part cheesy, part fluffy, part glossy nonsense.
Maybe If You Weren't The Worst - Can You Ever Forgive Me?
It is not a surprise that a movie could be so technically strong and so emotionally weak. But what is a surprise is that everything that’s wrong with the movie was wrong before the cameras started rolling. That is what I can’t forgive.
To Old Friends - Halloween
Michael Myers remains the slow-walking, homicidal maniac that sparked a revolution in the genre and he is chasing down a teenage girl with a multi-generational spit. When it comes down to it, what more could you really want?
Divided We Laugh - The Oath
The Oath endeavors to present a credible but outlandish take on where we might be headed if politics keep unfolding the way they have recently. And while I’m not sure the end result is plausible, it’s certainly close enough to possible to be thought-provoking, original and genuinely funny. You will see us in this.
They Got There Eventually - First Man
The original footage of the moon landing is so primitive that seeing this version is jarring and incredible. But it took us almost as long to get to that as it did in real life. The first hour and a half is spent with our feet firmly planted on the Earth and therein lies the problem.